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Irwin Edgehill Training

Supporting individuals and teams to build their confidence and resilience empowering them to transform their personal & professional lives.

Category: Life Coaching

Painful feelings cannot enter a conscious mind. 

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Do you ever feel overwhelmed with all the feelings that go through your mind in any given moment? Are these feelings painful and in many cases very painful? Then please read on….. 

Whether you believe it or not, it’s a fact that many people to one degree or another suffer needlessly from misleading hostile voices within their minds. All of us are a target and are affected! Depending on how consciously aware we are of our thoughts throughout the day, will impact on how well we can do something holistic to combat them.

I recently delivered a Self-Esteem workshop when one of the participants asked:

“Irwin, is it possible to go through a week let alone a day, without having painful feelings and suffering majorly as a result, about something that happened in the past or is happening now?”

Authentic piece of mind
My response to her sophisticated question. And I say sophisticated because it is our actions to questions such as these that will begin to bring authentic peace of mind from painful feelings. But only if we are willing to take the steps and make the sacrifices required to live emotionally, psychologically, and mentally pain free of such feelings.

  • Are you willing to sacrifice 30 minutes each and every day to enter a conscious mind? 
    Before you start any task including work or looking after the children you need to spend time to gather your thoughts. Being mindful of negative thoughts from the past or present, you need to put yourself in a state of gratitude for the things you have now instead of being focused on the things you don’t have.
  • Are you willing to stop giving added energy to negative thoughts?
    Realising that focusing on them, as you do now, will do nothing but perpetuate those painful feelings.
  • Are you willing to persist with this new way of living and being? 
    It may seem like an incredibly daunting task for the first few weeks or even months, but it is virtually impossible to achieve anything of any real value without being fully committed.
  • Are you willing to ignore any negative put downs from others?
    There will be those who will be secretly or openly against you trying to free your mind. To escape from the tyranny of those painful feelings, you may have to decide to leave those types of people behind!

If you can say YES to all the above, then congratulations you have a real chance of a positive breakthrough. The next step is to get in touch.

Let us help you become one of the few who’s painful feelings no longer cause a major problem for them each and every day because they are consciously awake to prevent it.  

Contact Irwin Edgehill training by calling 07842 435921 or email info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk and let us help you begin your journey of authentic emotional, mental and psychological salvation.

Is sending everyone to the Psychiatrist the right approach? 

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Do you believe other people are entirely responsible for all your continued issues? Are you going to have to book them all in to see a psychiatrist for you to get better?

Unfortunately, many people do believe this to be the case. But ask yourself honestly, do you feel any better emotionally or spiritually thinking this? What are your relationships like, as a result, are they harmonious ones?

I’m guessing if you are truly honest with yourself then the answer is more than likely going to be a resounding NO. This is brilliant news for you and your mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing. It’s also just as important for your nearest and dearest. They too will feel infinitely better knowing that you are finally getting on the road to recovery by positively changing the way you are thinking about your issues.

Why brilliant news?
I say brilliant news because of the fact you can now put yourself in the position of working through the pounding persistence of these issues, some of them being deep seated views. 

Get the right help!
By getting the help of an organically competent therapist. They will help to positively guide you out of the emotional swamp that these constant, painful, thoughts and feelings have put you in. And eventually they will help you make those issues either vanish or become a lot lighter than they are now. 

Without doubt, we have all been wronged or negatively misguided in the past or present, some of us more harshly than others. My point is we have already emotionally paid for this, we don’t have to keep continually paying for it day after day, month after month, and year after year. What we need to do is first try to recognise the fact that there is no positive value in thinking that everyone else is responsible for how we continue to feel, and as a result act.

Get in touch
So why not free yourself from the pounding persistence of your issues and contact Irwin Edgehill Training for a far cheaper and more effective option than sending everyone to the psychiatrist in order to make you feel better. Call 07842 435291 or send a message to info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk Let us help you make this a thing of the past.

Let me pile all my issues on you and let’s call it love.

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This title was taken from a relationship coaching session that I provided recently to a local couple.

One of the main issues they were facing was that one of them thought that now they were together it gave them carte blanche to pile all their issues on to the other person and call it love. Seriously damaging their chances of having an authentic, un-conditional loving relationship. 

This made me think and reflect on my past relationships, with the shocking realisation that I too had experienced the same thing. But it did enable me to offer an authentic real-life solution to their miserable situation.

The fundamental reason why, in my opinion, so many couples experience similar painful and unnecessary problems is because they do not work on their issues, just as I never used to do. As a result, they go into a relationship wearing a false mask of sanity and emotional control, when in reality they are anything but. 

The reason I used to wear my false mask was because I thought the other person wouldn’t like me if I told them my truth. Not realising starting a relationship with a lie will always end badly because a relationship founded on any negativity will never be able to withstand life’s natural storms.  

My solution to them which I am now offering to you:

Don’t be accepting of this type of relationship. If you are currently in a relationship like this, it exists because firstly and fore-mostly you are accepting of it. If you didn’t accept it, you wouldn’t be involved in it. You would recognise that it will only get worse and in turn will make you feel depressed and resentful. 

Work on yourself harder than anything else. Not adhering to one of the golden rules as previously posted about is a huge mistake.  Whatever emotional or mental issues you may have, it’s wise to get some help and guidance to work on them before you enter into another relationship. Or if you find yourself going into a relationship whilst you are working on your issues. Have the courage to let the other person know you are as this will save a lot of resentment and mistrust going forward. 

This may all sound like basic advice but alas it’s this type of advice that many people are not aware of, or they never act upon it.

Get in touch

If you are currently in a relationship where the other person is piling all their issues on to you and calling it love, give Irwin Edgehill Training a call on 07842 435291 or send us a message to info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk Let us help you make this a thing of the past.

Where there is NO WILL, there will be NO WIN!

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WILL you do the things today that WILL get you where you want to be tomorrow, next month, next year and the years’ after that? Have you got the right help in place to ensure you get there?

Unfortunately, if you haven’t got the WILL you will never WIN. You will never achieve anything of any real value such as good health, peace of mind or strong relationships whether they be business, platonic or romantic.

Sadly, many people use WILL the wrong way which is the main reason they don’t and won’t WIN any of the above. This makes them feel depressed, stressed, anxious and lacking in confidence. I say ‘sadly’ because in my own experience of working on myself and in turn helping others to do the same, it doesn’t have to be this way. If you use WILL in the way it is intended, you WILL positively win.

If you are currently saying to yourself any of the following, then STOP!

  • I WILL never get that job
  • I WILL never get the grades I want
  • I WILL never meet the right person
  • I WILL never be happy
  • I WILL never have peace of mind
  • I WILL never rid myself of my depression, stress, anxiety, lack of assertiveness and confidence
  • I WILL never kick my street drugs or alcohol habit
  • I WILL never be able to say NO when people ask things of me instead of always saying YES which in turn makes me feel bad, sad and angry at myself

So, all you need is WILL! The question is how can you get it? Who can you call on to get the help and support you need at any time day or night?

Well look no further than Irwin Edgehill Training. Let us help you WILL yourself to peace and authentic happiness in all areas of your life. Contact us via Email: info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk  or call 07842 435921 to begin the journey.

Why not create a space for the good that you desire?

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Have you ever wondered why the things you really want from life are so elusive? Have you tried different tools and techniques in order to get the things you want but are still no further forward?  Have you tried nothing at all, thinking that what you have now is all you are going to get? 

If you have said YES to any of the above then now is the time for you to start creating a space for the ‘good that you desire’. 

I used this simple but extremely powerful concept with a couple that I was recently life coaching. One of their biggest challenges was that their lives were crammed with negative emotions left over  from past experiences and memories that they hadn’t worked through as individuals before they got together. These emotions were now having a huge impact on their mental, emotional and physical well-being. They were also placing a huge strain on their marriage, relationships with the children and their positions at work.

So the first question I asked of them was: ‘What are you both willing to sacrifice in order to live the life you have imagined?’ The reality being that you can’t get the things you desire without discarding an equivalent amount of negative emotions.

Fortunately for them they were both willing to commit to stop visiting ‘the scrap yards’ of their previous lives.  By doing so they created the space for us at Irwin Edgehill Training to provide them with the right support and guidance they needed to begin to focus on their future.

Working on their emotions harder than they worked on anything else gave them the opportunity to begin to live their relationship to its fullest brightest self. All because they were willing to create a space for the good that they desired.

How about you? Are you willing to create a space for the good that you desire in your business, platonic or romantic relations? 

If you are then make your desire a reality by contacting us at Irwin Edgehill Training for the right help and guidance. Email: info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk or call 07842 435921.

Have you got what it takes to live on easy street?

Have you got what it takes to live on easy street?

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As an ice breaker in a recent workshop I ran on ‘Relationships’ I asked the participants: “What do you want from life?” Their responses included:

  • I want to be happy
  • I want good mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health
  • I want to be financially independent
  • I want peace of mind
  • I want healthy relationships with my wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend and friends
  • I want a good job
  • I want a nice house with a garden
  • I want to go on nice holidays regularly
  • I want to be free of street drugs and alcohol
  • I want to be able to go 24 hours without worrying about something

I continued: “How many of you have got the burning desire, a plan and the right help to achieve these things?” Unsurprisingly, NO hands went up.  

This was not a surprise to me.  Most people want to ‘live on easy street’; having health, wealth, peace, happiness and good relationships.  Unfortunately, in so many cases they will never get there. Not because they can’t, but crucially they haven’t got the deep burning desire needed to start, aided by the right help and plan. 

How about you? Have you got what is needed to live on easy street? 

Do you  have a burning desire to achieve the changes necessary to live on easy street?  Do you have conviction in your ideas as well as the confidence and assertiveness needed to bring them to fruition? Are you seeking the right help to support you in achieving the life you desire?

If the answer is NO then contact us at Irwin Edgehill Training and let us help you make that desire a reality. Email: info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk or call 07842 435921.

Stay away from the scrap yard

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Take a moment to think of your car or if you like the car you’ve always wanted to own. Remember all the places you have travelled or visualise the trips you would like to make. Think about the fun it has provided and the fond memories created. Brings a smile to the face doesn’t it.

Imagine you are out for a leisurely drive. Feels great but then disaster, someone crashes into you and your car is written off. How would you feel? Gutted I bet.

So how would you respond? Would you get out of bed at 3 in the morning and walk, now you haven’t got a car or get a taxi all the way to the scrap yard where your crumpled car is laying in a heap? Would you peer over the fence just to have a look and either get angry at the thought of what happened to it, or sad and depressed because it’s no longer in your life?

Would you do this over and over again for year after year? I’m pretty confident that the answer would be ‘NO’.

So why do the equivalent when there is a break up in a relationship?

Well that’s what the majority of people do whenever there’s a break up of some sort in their relationships be it business, platonic or romantic. My question to a group of men and women that I passed on this concept to whilst delivering a workshop on ‘Comfort zones and the benefits of stretching out of it’ was: How many of you are still haunted by experiences and memories from the past because you continually visit the ‘Scrap yard’? No surprise every hand in the room went up in agreement.

If you are finding it difficult to overcome a crash from a past relationship of any kind, then remember that unless it’s dealt with in the right way you’ll continue to suffer from it not only mentally and emotionally but physically too. You have to learn that there is absolutely no value in letting this situation continue as well as understand the tactics and strategies that can be put in place to help you overcome this personal challenge.

Interested? Want to find out more about the Scrap yard concept and how to deal with it?

Contact us at Irwin Edgehill Training and discuss our range of services and solutions we offer that focus on enabling individuals deal with and move on from relationships that have broken down . Email: info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk or call 07842 435921.

What makes a good Life Coach?

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On a day-to-day basis, coaches face many challenges. Life Coaching is an ongoing process, a method of continuous development and a significant learning experience for both coaches and clients. As a process it’s important to not be afraid of taking a wrong turn but then learn from ‘mistakes’.

The key to this is realising that these aren’t ‘mistakes’ or failings in the first place. What many people regard as mistakes are in fact lessons, experiences and opportunities to learn and develop, but because the majority aren’t aware of this they trudge through life depressed, anxious, stressed, resentful and angry.

Florence Scovel Shinn in her book ‘The Game of Life and How to Play It’ has some helpful tips to say about mistakes and learning. So does Napoleon Hill in his phenomenal book ‘Think and Grow Rich‘.

A good Life Coach must demonstrate resourcefulness and help people to see that if they think they have failed in the past, this does not need to resemble or have any bearing on their future as long as they use the learning experience in the right way.

Listening skills, holding the client accountable for any goals set and giving as much advice, knowledge and guidance to the client is a vital role of the Life Coach. To do this the Life Coach must ensure that he or she is studying the right information themselves in order to give out the right information.

There are many ways to train to be a life coach both in person and on-line. One such on-line example is iNLP Center.

In my experience as a coach I believe the biggest challenges that Life Coaches face boils down to how authentic and sincere they are, in other words is it a vocation or just a job? If it’s a vocation then great both coach and client have a real chance of success, because if a Life Coach is constantly working on themselves with the right knowledge it goes without saying that he or she will be a top of the range coach, who in turn will produce top of the range results for their clients.

If it’s just a job and the so called coach doesn’t believe in what they are doing, or just doing it for the money they won’t last very long. And that is the problem here. A lot of people think Life Coaching is an easy way to make a living and feel good about themselves. All you need to do is sit and listen to a person’s woes, offer some fluffy advice and job done.

If you have this type of attitude about Life Coaching my advice would be don’t do it!

Interested in Life Coaching ? Want to find out more?
Contact us at Irwin Edgehill Training and discuss our Life Coaching services . Email: info@irwinedgehilltraining.co.uk or call 07842 435921.